hi my name is Lillian, and it was caliente!

i dont kno, maybe you hadto be there for it. bc it was fucking hilarious. last night was fuUuUuN.well here was my day, i had plans to go to oxford valley looking for a job. when im over chrissy's my mom calls me asking f i can get gwens camera and drive all the way down to olney to give it to her. ok the only reason i didnt wanto was bc of all the bullshit she made me go thru the last few days. so when i started to say no she started yellin at me to make me go n im like "why should i do it?! you never trust me anyway about where im going, im surprised you believe me right now im at chrissy's!!" ugh but i knew i would never hear the end of it if i didnt go, so i gave her her fucking camera, there was no film in it so i bought fkn film for her too, twelve fucking dollars.ugh anyway enough of that, on to the fun stuff. i applied to like 7 or 8 places in oxford valley. but the funny thing was when me n chrissy walked into the mall. there was a massage-ing display n this cute dude wanted to massage my back with these to blue plastic thingies with balls on the end. wen we were leaving we wanted to talk to him again but he wasnt there :( every mall has their freaks. its so funny.anyway wen we got back to philly me n chrissy got kristen MC n went to the walmart and the mall. gwenny was working yesterday at walmart :D n so were her boyfriends...... hehe. then we were gonna see a movie but wen we got outside we decided it was too nice out to waste the good cool air. so we went into the dollar store and got cool games to play outside. frisbee, a baseball, and stacking chairs! I AM THE STACKING CHAIR QUEEN! we need a second set for the challenge! anyway we met up w steve then played all our good games at the playground. then talked with these nice people at the playground when we had our millions of cookies, chips, and milk. GHETTO PICNIC! oh by the way, i only date spanish guys. i was de-virginized by a two spanish guys. at the same time. it was caliente! *rolls on floor holding stomach* hahahahahaha! oh and my boyfriend, ricardo, is in mexico visiting relatives right now. aaaaaaaahhh hahahahaha!!stacking chair champion right here!

heyYyYy.. so whats the agenda for tonight?

iv got nothing so far. :D i havent seen pluta in a while, but i have a feeling if i call her up, she'll not wanto hang out w me n want to hang out with james. i *would* go shopping but i should save my money since i wont be working for a while. Project Decoy Job: i have to find a "decoy" job that i can quit after two weeks than work with george again. so now i hafto apply to a place that will hire me real fast. and i need a job thats kinda far so my parents wont wanto stalk me after the first two weeks. so im thinking, Oxford Valley Mall. i gotta get crackin on that one. oh geez.. another God awful interview i hafta go thru.... for a stupid job i dont even want. You are a Siamese! You are fun-loving, playful,energetic, talkative, and exotic. You are thecenter of attention and you love every minuteof it. What breed of cat are you? brought to you by QuizillaYou get vengeful satisfaction, but you usually letsomeone else do the dirty work for you. Hey,it's cool. That's what the mob is for, right?? What's your type of vengeance? brought to you by QuizillaYou are Neo, from "The Matrix." Youdisplay a perfect fusion of heroism andcompassion. What Matrix Persona Are You? brought to you by QuizillaWhoooo weee!!! Youre a loud, boisterous burlyogre!. You are one of the guardians to thegates of Buddhist hell dimensions. You like tosmash and bash and eat and make loud noises(which don't necessarily come from your mouth).You love the taste of flesh and battle. Butdeep down, you're soft hearted and wonder whypeople just don't understand that it's yournature. Perhaps abstaining from fights with thelocal wild beasts will let the humans see thatyou can be a good ogre that smells likeflowers... NOT! What Japanese Creature are you? brought to you by Quizilla What Keeps You Going? brought to you by QuizillaYou are the phone! Which type of communication are you? brought to you by QuizillaYour soul came from the Bowels of HELL! You're ademon preying on the mortals of Earth. BACK TOHELL WITH YOU! Where Did Your Soul Originate? brought to you by QuizillaSurprise! You are a unique bride! What Kind of Bride Will You Be? brought to you by Quizilla

"okay im definitely wearing a sock on my head".....

that was me, kristen, and chrissy the other day at the plymouth meeting mall. omg it was so funny, me n chrissy were ninjas and kristen was a scuba-er. hahahaha! oh man you hadto be there. maybe this will give you an idea: well anyway, yesterday was work :) then i went to the mall and got some shoes... today im not working bc my parnents are... well lets not say those words. but ill probly work tomorrow. ya kno i was thinking about the last few days. and my conclusion was.. wow i got problems. im just so glad i have one helpful sister and lots of friends who care and listen. uhh well, some more than others. some just call to talk to other people they are currently with, not even pay attention to what youre saying, and dont even attempt to comprehend the severity of your problems. yeah THOSE people i will just hang up on :D yeah staying out all night to watch the sunrise till 6 am with steve made me realize: although i am so mean, i can be nice too. its just people dont give me a reason to be nice to them.yesterday i was at Chi Chi's with Chau, George, Paul, and Gavin for dinner. when i was in the bathroom, the hostess was in there washing her hands. while i was washing mine she asked me if i went to ryan.i said: yeahher: yeah i noticed you, youre gonna be a senior right?me: yeah. i dont remember seeing you but then again i dont kno facesher: oh i remember everyone's faceme: yeah i have a friend like that.. was it the hair that made you notice me?her: well it was your hair at first that i noticed, then i remembered you wore bright green pants to schoolme: hah. yeah that was meahhh how hot is that.

so hey it's sunday.......

im still sick :-( last night i couldn't even do anything i was so congested. well me n kristen tried to cheer me up with some shopping but uhh didnt work too well. i made a new friend tho! he's my purple haired friend, adam!omg how hot is this, its adam at the prom:[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<img [...] </center>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]im still sick :-( last night i couldn't even do anything i was so congested. well me n kristen tried to cheer me up with some shopping but uhh didnt work too well. i made a new friend tho! he's my purple haired friend, adam!omg how hot is this, its adam at the prom:<center><img src="http://www.angelfire.com/rebellion2/vy/adams_prom.jpg" width="320" height="240" border="0"</center>you kno me, n you kno thats hot. haha. its hot hot heat.but anyway, today should be fun, goin to a party. and it seems my dad's throwing one here.. some dude downstairs is sitting at my piano and i have no idea who it is.

yeah so how was everyone's night?

i was at home sick. im glad i stayed home, i went to bed at 9 pm last night. and slept for about 11 hours. thats why im up at 8 am today. a miracle, never thought i could see morning till another 3 months. ya kno i was thinking.. the last few days iv spent alot of time w my sister and her soulmate, George (hehe). and i kno chau already said that her friends would do anything for her if she asked. i dont kno, when i was over there like she would ask paul and georgeto do something like open the windows in the dining room and normally when i sat there listenig i thought they'd be all like "ughh.." but they werent. even when they were tired and sittng down theyd go do it. i dont kno, i guess what im trying to say is.. i have very low faith in the human race. i underestimate alot of them thinking they are all lowlife scum bags and are complete little asshole douchebags. im not trying to say i think this already about every human out there, but i *do* have a very low faith level for alot of people. only bc i havent been shown much to WANT to respect people. ok i dont want everyone reading this to think i hate them, bc thats not it. its just.. i havent really been shown much that would make me WANNA be nice to people. hey how bout that.i was thinking about something else too. over the last couple days, i have been lying ALOT to my parents. (making allebyes to go work w george) is it really wrong to lie like that? bc i do it so casually now. i kno its wrong, but what is also wrong is trying to separate sisters. and i know i lie alot to them about where im going, i lie so i can do things they tell me specifically not to do.. like lying saying im over a girl's house till 4 am when im really over a guy's house. but hey im not a little slut, its not like i stay over a different guy's house every weekend ya kno? i dont kno, is what i do really that wrong?.. i was just wondering about that last night before i fell asleep.oh man i cant wait till all this rain goes away. my pool's almost done being cleaned. hey a congradulations to my best friend, danny! he got his driver's licence yesterday! well, tomm's melissa's party. i wont swim but ill sit there on the chair. wow as one can tell i am very bored that i am just ranting on about pointless things in here. hey does everyone like the way i made my journal look? i spent countless minutes perfectng it to be this sexy! Which kind of ocean-side beach girl are you? brought to you by QuizillaYou Have the Power of Teleportation! What's Your Magic Power? brought to you by QuizillaYou have average whoreyness... You are probably atthe same level of physical relationshipmaturity as most people your age or you arecareful about who you are intimate with. Begood. What kind of whore are you? brought to you by QuizillaSexy What word describes you? brought to you by QuizillaYou are the grenade launcher, extremely deadly andknowing you, YES YOU, you would kill yourselftrying to fire it What weapon are you? brought to you by Quizilla

wee wee!

BASICS THAT BORE YOUFirst off, what's your name? VyWhy did your parents name you that, and do you wish they hadn't? dude my name is AWESOME! only two freakin letters longHow old are you? 17 babyHow old are you emotionally? (As in, do you think you handle your emotions pretty well and have sorted through most of them) How about mentally? emotionally? pretty bad, even tho i got lotsa experience in that shit (fucked up ppl i know)SEX, ETC. Let's get this one over with- have you ever even had sex before? nah i havent done the nasty, sorryIf you're a virgin, do you plan on having sex before you get married? i dont want toAre you straight, bisexual, gay, or lesbian? straight, but i joke around a lot about being gay or bisexual, my friends must seriously wonder, i kno tom does!Do you feel comfortable talking about sexual things or uncomfortable? comfortable i guess, i like to ask curious question to my friendsDo you feel comfortable talking about sexual things regarding your own experiences, what turns you on, etc.? uncomfortable, bc i like keeping things iv done w other ppl to myself, its private business ya kno. i may talk about it but i dont go off into madd detail. i have curious questions like kristina haha. i tell everyone what turns me on tho haha, i cant help the sexiness of a nipple toppled with ice cream!On a scale of 1-10, one being the least, and ten being the most, how perverted do you feel you are? it depends. i can be like 8 sometimes but i have self control thats the thing If you're a teenager, are your hormones making you undoubtedly horny? you jus answered your own question, teenager=horny haha. sometimes i feel outta control but i stop myself, im a good girl ;)Have you ever had a sexual dream before, or "wet dream?" Feel free to describe. i never had a dream where i had sex before nah, but i had a dream where i was about toWhat do you think of pornography? Have you ever seen it? hahaha GAY PORN! i like watchin two gay guys kiss but nothing without pants. thats gross, if i even DID watch a porno movie (n no i wouldnt be in it) id do it to make myself laugh, not to turn myself on, if i wanted to be turned on id go out n get my jollies w someone elseDo you have any fetishes or things that automatically start to turn you on? If so, what are they? haha kissing, licking, or biting my neck drives me crazy. when *i* get to do stuff to someone else's nipple, thats hott. n when someone grips my waste on the sides (dont ask, bc i dont kno either), or when someone rubs my butt or behind my leg ahh or gripping me real hard :P (too much info i know)Are you flexible, or do flexible people turn you on? (If you don't understand how this question is sexual you probably never will.) that wouldnt really matter to meHow do sex scenes in movies make you feel? Disgusted? Hot? entertained bc i laugh so hard. unless its jus too grusome n graghic then i jus turn my head. what annoys me is that you see everything on a gurl but NEVER a guy's schlong! grrDid you lie on, or avoid answering any of the above questions? nah, theres jus some of my thoughts i didnt fully shareLOVEDo you believe in love as a concept? Why or why not? love is a feeling. but i really truely believe love is just something people don't consider in their minds, some people just do some things that are so evil that i just can't understand how they have a beating heart in their chest (FUCK LOVE)Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend? oh HAILL no!Do you love them? Why or why not? --How long have you been together? --If you answered no to the first question in this section, do you have a crush? hehe ;)Do you love them? noo0o0o, what did i say about love, cmonOn a scale of 1-10, one being the least and ten being the most, how important is your boyfriend, girlfriend, or crush to you? uhmm..... not that important, bc friends n sisters are what really counts. i have a habbit of giving too much space to a guy (thats what i THOUGHT they liked..)On a scale of 1-10, how important is the way your boyfriend's/girlfriend's/crush's family feel about you to you? just not pure hatredIf your family hated your crush, boyfriend, or girlfriend, would you still go out with them? Why? yeahhhhhh. pshhh thats the reason i HAFTO stay with them! spite is in my bloodDOES your family hate your crush, boyfriend, or girlfriend? they dont know emAre you physically attracted to your crush, boyfriend, or girlfriend? Why or why not? of course, if i thought someone was ugly why would i hook up w themDo you think The Beatles were high when they wrote the song, "All You Need is Love?" probly, bc most of the time, it doesnt seem love can be expressed from some pplHow do you know when you love someone? i love ppl in a platonic way but not the "love-love-boyfriend" wayIs love worth it? probly not, sorry im so cynical. ok fine, yes it is. bc you learn good lessons. like "oh dont waste your time again next time on a loser like that"FRIENDS Who is/are your best friend/s of the opposite sex? danny kyle tom nickWho is/are your best friend/s of the same sex? chris kris kris krisName one or two people you know you would die for. my sisi chauOn a scale of 1-10, how important are your friends to you? to infinity and beyond!Have you ever fallen in love with a friend? nahhhhhhh i make sure i dont like my friends, bc that complicates thingsHow well do your friends know you? Do you think they would still be your friends if they knew EVERYTHING, no exceptions, about you? i dont kno, probly notTen years from now, which friends do you hope to still be in touch with? Why? every one of them. like dannys mom said "only asian friends you can keep!" hahaYOUR PSYCHE Do you have any diagnosed mental disorders? If so, what? probly Do you have any undiagnosed mental disorders? If so, what? probly bipolarIf you do in fact have a diagnosed or even undiagnosed mental disorder, describe what it feels like and/or your personal experiences with it. mood swings?Have you ever been to a therapist, psychiatrist, or psychologist before? not really, but i have a feeling i will when i can pay for it myselfDo you think your dreams are a window into your soul? no, jus symbols of what youv been thinking about latelyHow would you describe yourself mentally and psychologically? fucked upDo you feel insecure with your own person? Have a self-esteem problem? If so, why do you think you do? i guess so, i mean i dont completely think im so pathetic that i will jump at the first cock that says "i love you" to me. im not the best out there but im not at the bottom of the barrel ya kno? but i guess the reason i feel i am that way bc of my parents, theyre so discouraging its traumatizingMUSIC Is music important to you? Why or why not? of course, most of someones actions reflect the music they listen toDo you sing? If so, do you sing well? yeah and ehhWhat instruments do you play, if any? nopeDo you or have you ever written music before? songs but not musicIn your opinion, what band is the best of all time? (Name a few if you can't decide.) manson! hahaNow for the lightning round. Do you like...Pop music: yeah, good danceRock music: yea!Punk music: yea!Rap music: a littleHip-Hop/R&B: yea, more grinding music heheCountry: a littleJazz: sleepy time :)Classical: yes!New Age: wtf is thatWhat is one band/singer you absolutely love that no one else does or seems to have heard about? new radicals hehePick up the nearest CD to you and write a random song lyric from it. "just a day, just an ordinary day"MOVIES, TV, ETC. What is your favorite tv show? freinds, scrubs, sailor moonWhat is your favorite movie? waynes worldIf someone made a movie about your life, do you think anyone would want to see it? the ppl who get entertained from seeing a fucked up family destroy itself, yeahWhat is your favorite TV character? sailor moonWhat is your favorite movie character? pocahontasFavorite actor? jackie chanFavorite actress? shanon elizabeth, shes soooooo hot hahahaha. most ppl wont understand that jokeISSUES What is your stance on abortion? if its needed, but not for a selfish reasonWhat is your opinion on gay people being allowed to get married? its 2 ppl that love each other, leave them beWhat is your opinion on gay couple adopting? fine with meDo you have a political party affiliation? If so, what and why? noo fuck politicsWhat do you think about sex before marriage? it doesnt appeal to me, if other ppl are gonna do it, then i hope love was involved, bc if it wasnt, then youre a fuckin whore or dumbass, n if it fucks up things, then its your own fault, n you should deal w your own consequences *cough*cough* to a dumb slut i knoTell us one thing you're pretty sure no one knows about. ok lets go. i sing in the shower hehe

o0o look its a new journal!

and i owe it all to kristin doll! the prettiest model i ever layed eyes on! :D